Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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