whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
