I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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