i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
