Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize