I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
