I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I looked at my own cervix.
I just gift wrapped bread.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
