Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
