that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
whose parrot is this?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
