Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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