I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
