Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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