why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
