bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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