Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
He felt like a one man threesome
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
