I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
