His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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