I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
