no. you can't hotbox the world.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
