oh god the rape fog is back!
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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