I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
