She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I could fuck to npr.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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