We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
