Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
