hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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