24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
