I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
