Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
