dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
