Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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