Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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