Midget sex pt 2 tonight
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
where am i from again
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
