Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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