Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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