Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
