I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
