you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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