I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Church boner. Awkwardddd
should my penis look like a turkey
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
