I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
