Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
you're hired as official boob wrangler
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
