His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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