And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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