It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
