so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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