We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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