How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
When are your genitals available?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
