i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
