And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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