Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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