Swine flu. Run for my life!
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
