I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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