I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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