I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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